For the non-psychic mothers of crying babies

Crying Babies: Every time my baby cries, someone asks me “what is wrong with her? Why is she crying?” I usually shrug and say I don’t know. Sometimes I’m tempted to ask them the same question, just in case they are psychic and they can help me…

I mean afterall, it’s very easy to figure out what is wrong with any baby. There can only be three options

1. Her diaper is wet and she needs it changed, or her diaper is too dry and it’s chafing her bum, or her diaper is too tight, or her diaper was not put on right and is hurting her or…

2. She is hungry and wants to eat, or she is full and wants to poop, or she wants to poop but it hurts, or she wants to poop but the diaper is wet, and she wants a fresh diaper to poop in then you look at option 1…

3. She is sleepy and wants to be rocked to sleep, she is sleepy but doesn’t want to sleep, she is sleepy but there is too much noise, she is sleepy but it’s too quiet, she is sleepy but she wants to be held a certain way, she is not sleepy but you are trying to force her to sleep so you can get work done, or she is sleepy but wants to be fed so that it soothes her to sleep then you look at option 2…

Bonus: And then ofcourse she may just want your attention, or want to be held, or want to be played with, or want to be talked to, or want to be among other people (not just you), or she is just trying to express herself, or she feels like crying, or she is missing her dad.

Now that you know the three step process plus the bonus, for why my baby may be crying, please feel free to decipher and tell me what her problem is, so that I can quickly administer aid, and save your ears from dealing with the noise.


– A not-so-psychic mother

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When NEPA / PHCN and fuel scarcity attack my baby’s milk – Fuel Scarcity May 2015

It has gotten personal. NEPA IS ATTACKING MY BABY!

It used to be easy for me to know if there was a power outage (which is frequent in Lagos, Nigeria), when I get to my neighborhood. If I hear the blaring sounds of generators I would know that there is an outage, but if it was quiet then I would know there was power, and I would smile and look forward to turning on the air conditioner and getting out of the blazing Lagos heat.

But today was different… I got to my neighborhood and it was quiet. I was able to listen very well because I didn’t have enough fuel in my car for the AC, so we were riding with the windows down. I listened hard, and heard nothing… I hoped and prayed that it meant there was power. Perhaps NEPA / PHCN had decided to grace us with their presence… I prayed earnestly… fervently… wishfully…

By the time I got home, I realized, once again, that NEPA / PHCN had decided to disappoint my child and I once again. There was no power, no light, no electricity… Alas what shall we do? And there was no fuel for the generator… I decided to encourage myself that soon and very soon, NEPA would come, or at least my husband would come back home and we would resolve the fuel/generator issue…

That was until I visited the closet that used to be a refrigerator… I call it a closet (wardrobe for my Naija peeps), because everything was was warm and still in there… there had been no light for a long time, my Fridge had stopped cooling…

Then I went to the freezer compartment and almost passed out!!!

The milk, my goodness not the milk, somebody please dial 119… The breastmilk that I had suffered to express into bottles for my not-yet-six-month-old-child… the one I had squeezed, drank gallons of water and all sorts of other milk-enhancing-drinks, to ensure that my child gets the six-months-exclusive-breast-milk that we have been told is needed for a child’s development, and which being a working mother makes it oh so hard for me to always be around my child to feed her, hence the need to express the milk in bottles and save in the freezer… Yes! that milk… The one that I had worked for weeks and weeks, so that I could have a few “in case of emergency” bottles… yes! that milk…

That milk was melting, and I did not know what to do. Once it was completely defrosted, I would have to throw everything away and start over… so here I sit watching the fridge/freezer praying for NEPA / PHCN to bring light, or for the government to fix whatever needs to be fixed so that I have enough fuel to power my generator and ensure my child has the best future…

My sisters please help me… NEPA / PHCN and fuel scarcity has attacked my baby’s milk and all I can do is wait…


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When it rains it pours

I’ve always disliked that phrase “when it rains, it pours.” Maybe because it has always been used in a negative way – when bad things happen, they just keep happening…

Well I’ve decided to use it in a different way, because I like to believe that when good things happen to me, they just keep happening. When my husband decides to give me the gift of time by holding the baby for a few hours, so I’m able to get some much needed rest, and then I’m able to write this blog post, which I enjoy doing… and to work on some other Top Secret projects, that I can’t wait to share with you soon…. yes! it rained, it poured, and I’m enjoying it, because when it rains, it rains good things.

Besides, I’ve always loved the rain :-)

I hope you’re expecting and enjoying good things in your life.

Happy Rainy Saturday Lagos!


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worrying? – God has handled it

The other day we were having a challenging issue with a client. I wasn’t sure how to deal with it so that the client would not think that I was being rude or disrespectful.  I decided to just sleep on it, and I hoped I would figure it out in the morning. Before I went to sleep, I kept thinking about how to address the issue, and when I woke up I continued thinking about the issue.

I decided that I would inform my boss about the issue and let him deal with it because I had tried and tried to figure out how to resolve it, but to no avail…

Later, however, I found out that my boss hd already handled it, even without my prompting… It felt good not to have to worry about that situation, but I also thought it was funny that I spent so much time worrying about something that had already been handled.

That’s how God is to us sometimes… We spend so much time and energy trying to resolve something that God has already promised us that we don’t have to worry about, because he has already handled it. Just because we haven’t stopped to take the time and acknowledge that we are not alone, and we never will be, does not mean that God is not right there with us solving all sorts of problems – some of them that we didn’t even know we had…

So I guess my encouragement today would be that whatever issue you may be dealing with, just sleep on it… and perhaps you will find out tomorrow that you shouldn’t have wasted time worrying.


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When your job is not your passion

I’m a big believer in finding your passion, and finding ways to work with that passion, but sometimes things don’t work out quite how you would like it to. Being a writer may not be the quickest or easiest way to make money, but it is still my passion…

The other day I was introduced to another way of thinking – doing the best in whatever you find to do. I thought that was such a great way to live your life. Whatever you find to do, do your best in it and you may find that it becomes something you enjoy, or at least something that earns you a lot of money…

My new way of looking at things is that even if your job is not your passion, it can still be pleasurable if you look at it a different way. If you look at that job as a fundraiser that helps you to pursue your passion, if you look at it as a means of staying fed, clothed, sheltered, etc, while you do other things that actually make you happy and make you feel fulfilled, then I guess having a job that is not your passion is not bad after all.


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That’s why it’s called physical parenting – mother’s day 2015

Often times when people ask me “how is motherhood?” I say “It is exhausting…”


On a good day I”m in bed by 8:30pm, on other days you may call me by 6:30pm and get offended because I didn’t pick up your call, but the truth is that I’m already fast asleep.

It’s funny to me how sometimes mothers who get to stay at home with their kids envy mothers who get to keep their kids in a daycare and vice versa. I hear things like “you’re so lucky, you can get a break” or “you’re so lucky you are with your kids the whole day.” and ofcourse the concluding statement is “I wish I could.” It’s funny to me because I’m realizing now that with this, as with anything in life, there is no state of perfection, if you get to stay at home with your kids, there will be moments where you wish you could use your brain, and your college degree for other things outside of speaking baby jibberish and changing diapers for the millionth time. And if you get to keep your child in childcare, there will be moments where you wish you could just see that toothless grin and twinkling eyes, instead of dealing with that annoying boss…

oh but yes, being a mother is exhausting… If you choose to breastfeed you’re feeding the child every two hours around the clock, constantly, 24/7, always, for what seems like eternity… then of course the child may decide that they want to play at midnight, because after all, it seems like a wonderful time to play, without realizing that every sane human being is trying to sleep at midnight….and then of course there are the poopsplosion (AKA poop explosion) that gets into everything and has you doing laundry at 2:00 in the am, on the same day that you have that ridiculously important presentation in the office, for which you have spent the last six months preparing, that has you wondering if you’re over feeding your child, or if you need to change your diet, or just stop eating altogether…

but no matter how exhausting, I must confess that I love the moments. I love seeing her face change from crying to smiling when she sees me first thing in the morning. I love her giggles when I’m changing her diaper after the 7th poopsplosion of the day, because for some reason her legs seem to be connected to her funny bones. I love her little blah blah blah, ah ah ah, wah wah wah babbles, when she wants to make sure that those conversing are aware she is around and they are not leaving her out of the conversation. I love how her eyes light up when her father comes back from work. I love how she tries to sing along with her nursery rhymes when we listen to them together. I love how she stares at new toys, examines and puts them in her mouth, showing me that she is OBVIOUSLY a genius…

So yes if you were to ask me “How is motherhood?” I would tell you (if you are a good friend, and I’m comfortable with you) “It’s exhausting… but I love it.”

Happy Mother’s day to all the Amazing mothers out there… enjoy your day, but don’t forget to enjoy the entire year… because you’re quite awesome.

Lasisi Family


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There’s nothing wrong with making money

making money – I don’t have problems with people who want to make money, and I definitely don’t have problems with people who like money, but what I don’t understand are those who want to make money without working.

Begging – There are those that are always begging for money, Can someone please explain how people can feel fulfilled with their lives when they are always begging.

Borrowing – For those people who are always borrowing, don’t they know that the borrower is at the mercy of the lender…

Dating – AKA Runs, in my time they called them gold diggers, but apparently now they call them runs girls. The funny thing is that the money never seems to last long.

Stealing – The worst of them all. period. full stop. I have nothing more to say.

The problem with this life is that we think we have lots of time. We think we have time to do all the bad things we want to do, and then make atonement later. We think we have time to hurt people, use people, and abuse people, and that all of this stuff won’t come back to hurt us.

We must realize that this life is too short. In the little time you have, do the good you can, because soon you will find out that life was never just about our comfort… and definitely not about just money.


Euro bills

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Letting go

Letting go – Whenever my daughter gets startled, she throws her hands up lets go of everything and falls backward. Although I know it’s a reflex reaction, I always mused at the ridiculousness of it – I mean why let go? why not hold on tightly when you’re afraid. I used to think of it as symbolic of us and how we often let go of everything when we’re afraid and how silly it is to let go of the very things that are supporting us…


Lately though I’ve been looking at it differently. Perhaps letting go is the right thing. Perhaps just like when my daughter lets go of her support system and I quickly catch her so she doesn’t hurt herself, that’s what does for us. Perhaps in those times of challenges God waits for us to let go of everything that we have chosen to rely upon, outside of him, and it is in that instance when we let go of everything else that he catches us, shows us how much he loves us, and reminds us that we don’t have to be afraid because he will always be there.


I won’t always be there for my daughter. And there will be times when I will do the wrong things, hurt her or cause her pain – not because I want her to be in pain, but because I am imperfect. Thankfully God will always be there for her, when I fail, and thankfully God is always there for me when I fall.


So today I encourage you to let go, and see what God will do.



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Love is more than words

Can you believe it? Valentine’s day is next week!!! EEEk***

Well I’m not surprised that Valentine’s day snuck up on me, I usually don’t do much…

But I’ve been thinking about the pressure people put on themselves on Valentine’s day. I remember when I was dating, something always happened to ensure that I wasn’t dating someone on Valentine’s day. Either whomever I was dating, and I would get into an argument, or I wouldn’t be dating anyone…I often felt disappointed because other than the sad single stem rose I received from this one boy in High school, I had never received flowers, and at that time getting a bouquet of flowers (and what that represented in my mind) was the desire of my heart. Years later, I did get the bouquet of flowers from my husband, yes I was thrilled, but it was no longer the most important thing to me, and perhaps that was why I cherished the gesture so much…

Anyway, so although people have a lot of pressure around this season, I’ve realized one thing, and that is true love is more than words.

A guy may say he loves you and cares about you, but he doesn’t call you, you’re the one always calling him.

A guy may say he cares about you, but he inconveniences himself for others before he inconveniences himself for you.

A guy may say he cares about you, but he may be spending more time with that other girl than with you.

A guy may say he cares about you, but his “caring” never touches his pockets.

The list goes on and on and on…

So this season, rethink what it means to love and be loved... I wish you a wonderful Valentine’s season next week

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What’s good about you

I know I know… you’re in shock! two posts in a row… well let’s just say I’ve had a bit of free time, and I’ve been thinking… and I thought I’d share…

Anyway, so I was listening to this podcast and they were talking about how we usually focus on what we think is wrong with us and create New Year’s resolutions on that premise… but we often forget to think about what’s right with us, or what’s good about us…

I was thinking about that, and I realized that it is sooooooo true, especially for us women…we focus too much on what we don’t like… so let me be the first to talk about what I like about you and what I like about me…

1. I like that you read my blog, enjoy my thoughts and share yours

2. I like that you are patient with me and understand that things are not always as they seem

3. I like that you are interested in becoming a better person

What I love most about myself is my desire to encourage people, and I think that’s something very good that I celebrate everyday.

So over to you – What’s good about you?

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